When I told Sarah my remuneration was 200k a month, she said with that I could not sustain her needs.
A year later I came back with my salary at 420k, she said it was good but not enough.
Another year passed and I came back saying it was now 600k, she said it was fine but she needed more.
When I told her I was a salaried mechanic,
She said I should look for a girl of my level.
Age was catching up with me, so I got Zennah.
She didn’t mind how much I had, all she wanted was my attention and commitment.
She didn’t bother that I came home in an oleaginous overall.
All she cared about was that I was working hard and earning clean money.
She didn’t ask questions when I came home without a black kaveera,
All she did was smile and improvised with malakwang for dinner.
Now I am a 4million shilling man a month, I drive a red Subaru.
Sarah is here asking me out.
Now I have my own house,
Sarah says she wants to settle down with me.
Now I have Zennah,
Sarah says she can be my second wife.
Now I am telling her no,
Sarah wants to commit suicide.
When I was a 200k amonth guy,
Sarah had no job.
When I was a 420k man a month,
Sarah was dating Benson, a middle aged sugar daddy from kilimani .
When I was a 600k a month guy,
Sarah was renting her own apartment in Roysambu, courtesy of John, Julius and Justin.
When I went back to try my luck for the last time,
Sarah was pregnant for one of the three Js.
When I met her on the road last month after five years,
Sarah was in the company of four children.
I gave up on Sarah because she said I was not man enough.
She now says that’s not what she meant.
I couldn’t be with Sarah because I was earning small money,
She now says money is not what she is looking for.
I let Sarah go because she told me she couldn’t choose even one out of a hundred men of my type.
She now says it’s me she wants.
I couldn’t be with Sarah because she was a classy girl who needed exotic maintenance.
She now says she doesn’t care about the Paris handbags.
I couldn’t be with Sarah because I was a mechanic and my greasy overall was too dirty,
She now says my job description doesn’t matter.
I am still a mechanic, what changed?